UPROOTING DISAPPOINTMENT (WHEN BREASTFEEDING IS HARD)
Let’s go ahead and face it: breastfeeding is hard.
And not just hard as in “deciding what to wear postpartum is hard,” but teeth clenching, eyes weeping, heart aching kind of hard.
Being a nursing mama requires so much of us – our time, our bodies, our schedules, our comfort.
It’s not that we aren’t willing to give what’s required, because we are; I just think it’s important to acknowledge the weight of it. It is heavy – and that’s okay to say out loud.
For many moms, the positives of breastfeeding outweigh the negatives. Eventually. At some point, the good surpasses the hard, and pendulum swings the other way. But for many others, that day never arrives. Sometimes, it stays difficult, beyond all reason and effort. Maybe it’s a latch issue. Maybe your baby has a physical obstacle that prevents proper feeding. Or your milk never comes in. Maybe you have to head back to work much too soon and the logistics of pumping at work just make your head spin. Or – Or – Or. There are a thousand reasons why our joy might be replaced with defeat.
When we feel disappointment collide with our breastfeeding journey, we have to handle our emotions carefully. Untempered disappointment can be like a tiny weed that grows into overwhelming feelings of failure; like a vine beyond control, convincing us that we did something wrong, that we aren’t enough, and that we’re alone in our struggle.
Friend, if that weed has been planted in your heart, I’m here to dig it up.
It does not bring life.
It has no place in your motherhood or your womanhood, for that matter.
In place of that constricting vine, let’s plant some truths into your heart today:
It’s okay to be temporarily disappointed; it is not okay to continue to beat yourself up.
It’s not your fault. Period.
You are not alone.
You are strong and capable.
Isolating will not help. Reach out.
Yes – it really is that hard. You weren’t just imagining it.
You don’t have to be perfect to be a good mom.
I believe disappointment has its place. It’s okay to wish something had turned out differently. But never allow disappointment to damper your joy and your spirit.
I hope these seeds of truth settle deep down in your heart, growing and blooming like crazy, so much so that there is no room for the weeds of disappointment or negativity. We can’t let something like breastfeeding break us. After all, this is just the beginning. And you know what they say about what doesn’t kill you….
You’re stronger. Yes you are.